Get real.
By: Karen

Let’s talk turkey- (forgive the obvious November reference)
I just read a study in my research class, which said our brain is incapable of recognizing when we are trying to fool ourselves or justify bad behavior. They cited a Princeton Research Study that said 87% of medical interns believe their counterparts are being coerced by pharmaceutical companies gifts, while only 17% believed that they themselves were being coerced.
As much as we want to believe that our intentions are pure, and we are making good choices, very often we are fooling ourselves.
We allow this phenomenon of shopping around until we get the rubber stamp we want for our behavior. If a friend does not agree with a decision I am making, I will call someone else who does so that I can go about my day feeling justified and at peace.
I do not like this about myself, but it is honest.
If a teacher grades a paper of mine poorly, than obviously they were biased or did not explain the assignment well! However, if I get an A, they are only recognizing my obvious abilities.

With all the heavy decisions and daily choices I am being faced with right now, it is imperative to me to make good sound judgments. However, I am self-aware enough to know that I am not self-aware enough.

So how can one possibly make good choices without all the rationalizations and justifications that go along with the poor ones?

Tough love.

All of us hopefully have friends and people in our lives that won’t give us a free pass on deluding ourselves. The friends who truly love us will call us on our “crap” and tell us to back up and try again. They love us enough to say, you are heading down the wrong road, back up, and take the detour.

In our lives we will be judged, disappointed, and hurt. We will be faced with the ugly monster inside of us that tells us the world owes us something for being so hard on us. But perhaps our greatest challenge is self-honesty and awareness.
In order to be the very best people we can be, we have to recognize our own weaknesses and short-comings, and to be very aware that where our reasoning is concerned we will suffer from blind spots.
Faced with a tough decision? Use your phone-a-friend card, and be prepared to hear the truth. It hurts at times, but it will make all the difference in the world. After all, it is so much easier to recognize another’s shortcomings, and friends who truly love us, want us to be the best we can be.
Love yourself enough today to hear the truth and be prepared to make a detour.